Is It Self Care If It’s Scheduled Down To The Minute?

I couldn’t help but wonder… when did self care stop being restorative and start feeling like performing art?

The other morning, I woke up to a Google Calendar notification saying: “Meditate. 7 minutes. Be present.” which would have been amazing, if I hadn’t been too busy reading the reminder to actually be present at all.

Somewhere between my 6:30am detox lemon water and 9:00am journalling session, I realised I hadn’t taken a single breath that wasn’t part of my routine. My mornings were no longer gentle, they were tactical. My “wellness” had become a war zone.

In London, even our self care is ambitious. We layer serums like were solving a puzzle. We do yoga while watching productivity hacks. We sit in saunas, sweating out our anxiety while worrying about getting to lunch on time.

There was a time when self care literally meant stepping away. Now it means curating a life that looks peaceful from the outside but we are still exhausted on the inside.

I once booked a “slow Sunday” and filled it with a gym session, protein smoothie, face mask and 10k steps before lunch. When I got home my watch was satisfied but I wasn’t.

Maybe it’s not about doing less. Maybe it’s about doing softer. Not because an app told me to but because my body did.

So I ask again: Is it still self care if it is scheduled down to the minute?

Maybe the real self care is giving yourself five unscheduled minutes - without guilt, without goals, and without a Google Calendar.